Cheers Poker Final

Hmmm poker crew considered it necessary that I blogged about Monday nights Poker Final although I'm not quite sure as to how I can present this blog without sounding like I'm showing off entirely...I'll blame my poor blog writing skills for that, but hey, here goes =)

I guess I don't wanna harp on about details as poker itself is quite boring from an outsider's point of view lol. Anyway, Cheers Bar has this poker tournament that runs every week with the final being played every 8 weeks or something like that, and Jho, Terence, Brian, Addison, Pshi and I play every Monday, a routinely meeting which Terence's sister refers to as "Ahhh yes, the gathering of the gaylords..."

And umm yeh, it's a free tournament so we're not really gambling, but there's a cash prize all the same and I won last night =). Not exactly though...we had been playing poker for about five to five and a half hours without much of a break and when it was down to the final two players we just decided to split the prize money to prevent playing for another hour seeing as we both had pretty much the exact same amount of chips (my butt had fallen asleep and the constant heart pounding and adrenaline rush was killing me >< )

So I'm feeling like quite the happy camper atm ^_^ never really having won anything before haha. I felt really bad for the guys coz I made them stand and sit around for all that time just watching me play so I'm glad that they stuck with me to the very end coz it really drove me to win it for those guys lol.

And the very best part of last night was, now with the prize money, my trip overseas is pretty much in the bag =D I don't hafto save up anymore coz I've reached the amount I wanted. Of course I'm not going to make a living out of this, I'd much rather complete my uni course and get a proper job that dusnt run as much of a risk, but last night was definitely a great highlight for me.

Hahahaha it appears that I have failed miserably...this blog just seems to be about me, me, me and I apologise for that (damn asians and their shitting english skills...).

Now I'm going to return to facebook...so boring at home T_T

It's something everyone has seen on TV or in a movie. Girls who think that they're "all that". I mean they certainly appear to be. Designer clothes wearing, good looking, rich kids. And it seems like they've got it all....that is, until they decide to say something...

Their stupidity is infamous. Yet until today, I believed that such people only existed in movies and television. Surely no one could really be that stupid in real life? Surely any kid who had grown up in a rich family must have an education? Surely anyone with simply an ounce of common sense could prevent themselves from appearing to be completely dim witted?

Apparently not =/

Today at work I spoke to possibly the two dumbest girls I've ever met in my entire life. They fitted the bimbo persona so perfectly, by the time they had left I was standing there in a fit of silent laughter. The first chick was hot as hell by for the life of me I couldn't figure out why she was such a moron. There I was doing my job, until I put a loaf of bread on top of a carton of eggs. Not a big deal right? Wrong.

Chick: Hey! What do you think you're doing?
Me: Uhh, excuse me?
Chick: Don't put bread on top of the eggs, you'll crush all the eggs!
Me: ...........oh...uh really? I didn't know that. (What the fuuuuuuuuuuccckkk???)
Chick: Uhh well duh!!
Me: (This loaf of bread doesn't even carry enough weight to crush a single egg WITHOUT the carton you crazy woman) Oh okay, well I'll put that in a seperate bag for you.

Shit thing is, as stupid as this girl is, I have to act like she's actually right =/ ....that's company policies for you...

Me: *puts her carton of eggs in one bag and her loaf of bread in the other* *Takes her second loaf of bread and puts it on top of the first one*
Chick: Oh my god, what are you stupid???
Me: (What the hell did I just miss????????) I beg your pardon?
Chick: Don't crush my bread with that other bread! Put them in seperate bags please!!
Me: (hahahahhahahahahhahahahhaha roflmao omgwtfbbq) Oh right. Sorry about that. *gives each loaf of bread a seperate bag*

At this point I'm getting pretty annoyed with the amount of plastic bags she's wasting. Not that I'm a tree hugger or anything, but her ignorance to this matter was getting on my nerves. And then came the tin cans....T_T

I put seven of them in a bag and she looks as if she missed out on winning prom queen or some shit. Each of these cans weighs about as much as an ordinary small jar of coffee. A plastic bag supports eight of these cans easily. =/

Chick: Can I get seperate bags for all these cans? What are you trying to do, fit all of my groceries into one bag?
Me: Sure. No problem. *gives her another plastic bag*
Chick: Ummm...how about some more? Give me two more bags please. Otherwise it's all going to be too heavy for me to carry!!
Me: (.......................................................*tumbleweed*........................................) *gives her two more bags* Umm...okay....

Really, I just didn't have the heart to tell her that carrying 7 cans in four bags is actually heavier than carrying 7 cans in one. At this point I've given up all hope. I wanna slam my head against a wall but I can't leave my register =(

When she's done it's like the rain is finally over, the clouds begin to clear, all the zombies drop dead, your best friend didn't actually get shot, and you're reunited with your long lost father. That is until her friend approached the counter with two items: A stick of eyeliner and a pen. As obvious as the answer should be, I still have to ask the usual questions...

Me: Do you want a bag for these?
Chick 2: Hahahaha uhh well like duh? How else am I going to like, get them out of the store?
Chick 1: Hahaha maybe he like, expects you to just carry them out with your hands or something.
Me: (I'm guessing your handbag is just there for you to store your manual on How to Breathe? O_o) *puts her two items in a plastic bag* Hahaha oh yeah, how silly of me.
Chicks: *takes the bag and pays for her items* Thanks.
Me: (Your parents must cry themselves to sleep every night) Thank you =)

It's painful for me to even think about it. But hey, that was part of my day at work for you. Afterwards I met up with Luke and Warrick and even my bro came along to watch Shrek 3 (In my case I was watching it again hehe) and we even managed to get some tricking done inside the cinema until they kicked us out coz they thought we were hanging back to go movie jumping. Check it out if doing random things in random places rocks your boat =D

http://www.snapdrive.net/files/124532/CINEmatrix%20v2.wmv

What the hell....I'm forced to take a day off work tomorrow >=(

Actually forced...I had my shift all set and everything, but my supervisor tells me that I'm not allowed to work more than 10 days in a row so I have to take a break....T_T

Now I'm stuck with a whole day of free time, nothing to do, not to mention not getting paid ><

Sure...I could study though...

Oh but on the plus side I'm getting broadband!!! Woooooooooooo!! Now that I got myself a job, paying 4 hours of work a month seems like such a breeze =DDDD

No more lag, no more annoying dial tones!!!

The downside to this is though, now I can't block unwanted calls to my home phone simply by going online =(

And now I can download viruses and adware and spyware....unlike before when they just simply couldnt download onto my computer fast enough hehehehe

Stereotypes at work...=/

As I was signing out today I spotted a "Serious Offenders" noticeboard that I never bothered to read before. On this noticeboard there were 4 posters of people who had commited serious offences at my workplace within the past month. Out of these 4 people, 3 of them were Vietnamese. Out of these 3 vietnamese people, all 3 of them were from Cabramatta...

Seeing those posters made me laugh out loud. Even though I believe racism is wrong, I still find stereotypes hilarious.

For example, and this is seriously in 90% or more of cases:

- Asian people will always do whatever it takes to get that super low price. They don't care that they have to wait 10 minutes for my supervisor, or that they are holding up everyone else behind them. If it means that they will pay 99 cents for something that's usually $1.99, they will stand there. FOREVER.

- Asian people that were not born here are not social people. Your greetings of "Hi how are you?" will be answered by either a grunt or a near inaudible "Hi". Any attempt to make conversation shall fail miserably.

- Single women living alone really do buy nothing else except those frozen dinner-for-ones. Even as they pass through the checkout, you can actually feel their loneliness.

- Lebanese males will always refer to me as either "Brother" or "Boss". This is awesome, despite the fact that I've never met any of these guys in my entire life.

- A guy with his obviously new girlfriend will dish out a $100 note to pay for his two packets of chips and a 1.25L bottle of Pepsi. Sure he looks impressive....that is until he's fumbling around with all the change I just handed to him for being a smartass.

- Italians always buy tomatoes. Always. I mean always. If they're in the Express lane with only one item, it'll be a bag of Roma Tomatoes. I guarantee it.

- If we have an insanely great saving. E.g. one box of washing powder is normally $4.20 but you can buy 3 boxes for $4.98, you will see all the white people going ahead and buying 3 boxes, sometimes 6. As for the asians? Ohhh no. They'll buy 24 boxes. MINIMUM. And they scramble and I mean literally scramble for those boxes as if they wont be there tomorrow.

- All mothers will have to ask me to put back at least one item that their small child has mischeiviously picked off the shelf while they weren't looking and dumped it in the trolley, only to have the mother trying to remember when on earth she decided to add a box of lollipops to her shopping list. All mothers will be completely unaware of the fact that they are all raising potential ninjas.

- Hot cakes really, actually, very realistically.....sell like hot cakes...=/

Gotta love the stereotypes. It makes work so much more fun when you see each of them pass you by. Otherwise I'd be bored all the time....standing there and talking like a parrot T_T "Hi how are you" "Here's your change" "Thanks" "Hi how are you" "Here's your change" "Thanks" "Hi how are..." *drops dead*

And I've now realised I have a serious spending problem =/ Getting paid by the week is awful >.< How do I control this??!?!

I blogged....someone give me a raise...

Women, Women, Women...

INSIDE KNOWLEDGE FOR BLOKES

Listed below are the 13 most innocuous, common words, phrases and sounds, and what they really mean when a woman says them.

1. Fine: This is the word a woman will use at the end of any argument that she feels right about, but needs to shut her boyfriend up. Never use "Fine" to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of these very arguments.

2. Five Minutes: This is in fact half an hour. It is equivalent to the "five minutes" that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's a fair trade.

3. Nothing: This actually means "something" and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has when she doesn't expect that you even want to understand. It is not worth even beginning to tell you what is wrong. "Nothing" usually signifies and argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".

4. Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing", and will end with the word "Fine".

5. Go Ahead (with normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "You do what you want, because I don't care." You will get the raised eyebrows "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and a "Fine", and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

6. Loud Sigh: Not actually a word, but still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you're an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing there and arguing with you over "Nothing".

7. Soft Sigh: Another verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that you can actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move, or breathe, or do anything to flag your existence, and she will stay content.

8. Oh: This word, followed by any given statement, means trouble. Example: "Oh, I talked to so and so about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit.

9. Oh (upward exclamation, beginning of a sentence): Usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie anymore to get out of it, or you will get the raised eyebrows "Go Ahead", and then you really will be in the fertilizer.

10. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard about whatever it is you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a raised eyebrows "Go Ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in big trouble.

11. Please Do: This is an offer, not a statement. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done.

12. Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say "My pleasure" or "You're welcome."

13. Thanks a lot: This is vastly different from "Thanks". A woman will say "Thanks a lot" when she is really having a go at you, especially with a heavy emphasis on the word "lot". It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way. You can bet on it - it will be followed by the "Loud Sigh".